This is a guest post contributed by Lara Chomout. You can learn more about Lara in her bio at the bottom of her post.

When homeschooling was simply a dream, I imagined... well… that we would be home. I remember asking the worried questions of socialization and which curriculum would serve us best. From these questions, I learned about the world of “homeschool community” and everything our (wonderful) local group has to offer.

So, of course, as I took a step into our first year of homeschooling, I added all the social things I could find- from Wild + Free groups, Co-Ops (P.E. co-ops, presentation co-ops, I even started a weekly co-op with friends) and sports. Everything we were involved in was wonderful, but I quickly learned I could not do all the things, homeschool my children, AND keep a house and be a mom and wife.

People would constantly ask me how I could do it all. They were impressed with me and the facade I had created. In reality, I wasn’t a very good mom at the time, my marriage was hurting, and I have no idea if my children were learning anything.

I was running on empty. I had to let things go.

The Season I Quit

A wise woman who has graduated 2 homeschool children told me to only add 2-3 extra curricular activities to our schedule. I didn’t dare look her in the eye and tell her most of our mornings were filled and that I tried to throw in as much schooling as I could into the pockets of time that I might have during the day.

Her wisdom had likely come from a “been there, done that” situation as she encouraged me to evaluate my commitments and pray over the ones that God would have us keep in our week.

Now here’s the deal. I’m not a quitter. If I’ve made a commitment, I will see it through, even if it costs my sanity. So to go to all the different organizations we were participating in and say we were quitting was NOT going to be easy for me.

“It’s like a bandaid,” she said. “If you take it off slowly it’s going to hurt. Rip it off. It’ll sting a little, but you’ll only feel better afterward.”

I remember sitting at my computer with my phone in my hand, taking a deep sigh and making the calls and sending the emails to different organizations, letting them know we would be breaking (*quitting) for the remainder of the year.

It was humbling, to say the least- but she was right. I already felt life being breathed back into my lungs with each call or email.

We spent some time “doing nothing,” with the exception of Wednesday nights at our church. It was a good season. A season to evaluate, see which things we were craving and which were beneficial to our family as a whole AND to our goals for educating our children.

Giving Away Our Time

I quickly learned the value of giving away our time as homeschoolers.

Previously we gave it away to practically all the things, which led to burn out and took activities that should have been beneficial and made them stressful.

As we added things back into our schedule, we really wanted to hold close two questions:

Who are we giving out time to?
Why?

We decided to add in a weekly co-op. Our family settled on one that breathed life both into our children and me as a parent as well. It’s mutually beneficial, we all get to socialize, and we love that it is at the end of the week.

Other than our weekly co-op, we resolved to not give away any of our mornings. I noticed quickly that when we plan something for the morning, the chances of us getting to school is VERY low.

We also added in piano lessons- making sure those lessons were in the afternoon as well.

The last extra-curricular we added was the P.E. Co-Op. We landed on this for a few reasons. Not only do our children love it, but it meets in the afternoon, the kids get exercise and insight into a new sport each month, and I get to find community with other homeschool moms.

As our children grow older, we may add some or take away something - but we choose to guard our time far more than we used to. Of course, there are exceptions, but because I guard our time, God has allowed me to open my time TO those exceptions. My door can be open to a grieving friend who needs a warm cup of coffee while the kids play in the other room. I can answer the phone call from a friend who just needs to talk, and I’m able to invite the neighbor’s daughter over when she watches us play in the driveway.

Evaluate Your Time

Write down everything you’re giving your time away to-- then next to it, write how it’s benefiting or taking away from your family.
Rip off the bandaid and quit a few things (or everything).
Evaluate when you’re the most productive. For us, we must safeguard our mornings. For others, they’re more productive after lunch. Plan your extracurriculars around that time.

The time you choose to give away should breathe life into your family. Evaluate where you’re giving away your time AND who you’re giving it away to. I promise you, once you make these changes, you’ll cultivate an environment in your home that breathes more life into your lungs and into your family as a whole.

Lara is a homeschool mom of two in West Texas. She is a graduate of Angelo State University with a B.A. in Mass Media with a focus in Journalism and a B.A. in German. She has a heart for sharing the gospel of Jesus to those near and far who have never heard his name. She blogs at Little School on Avondale and you can find her on Instagram and Facebook.

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